Having experienced a traumatic situation/childhood/relationship is so exhausting because you think you’re doing better and one day you just wake up and realize that things are going downhill again. Out of nowhere. I wish i would be over it already but it seems as if there’s no finish line for healing.
A type of reassurance seeking in people with Pure-O (OCD) is “research reassurance”. I’ve spent hours researching things to make sure things are “OK”, reassuring myself of my health, my relationships, everything. I get locked in. I don’t even realize it most of the time. I guess I think it helps, but it also makes me feel pretty crazy. It sucks to sit with the feeling of not knowing, feeling unsure, feeling doubt. But it helps to know this is manifestation of OCD.
